I’ve just been informed that the next Star Wars goes into pre-production this September, with casting soon after, so get those letters rolling now (scroll down for the addresses) and get your petition info to me ASAP. REGskywalker@grumpyfish.com

GREAT NEWS!!

The REG Temple has reached the semi-finals in this years Australian Internet Awards, with the three finalists still to be announced.

Please click here to visit their site, before August 6th, and vote for the REG Temple, in the popular choice award. Cheers!

Brighton Outdoor Screening – 24th July 1999

“I DEMAND TO HAVE SOME BOOZE!”

Spend a hot summer’s evening relaxing in the great outdoors, enjoying a pint or two of Stella Artois and watching the classic British drinking comedy Withnail And I-for free!

AH THE ENGLISH SUMMER, THE SOUND of leather on willow, lazy picnics on starched white linen. Massive cinema screens belting out movie classics under the stars.

That’s the way it’s going to be this summer as Stella Artois repeats its massively successful Stella Screen Outdoor Tour-a chance to see one of the world’s finest films as God intended, as part of a tour which attracted over 100,000 happy punters last year-specifically home-grown masterpiece Withnail And I.

To take advantage of a night movie heaven courtesy of Stella (and their big celluloid pal Channel 4 who’ll be screening the movie a week after the Brighton screening), simply turn up on the specified dates and venues below and enjoy some of the finest comedy experiences in Christendom.

WITHNAIL AND I FILM SPECTACULAR

-Stella Screen Brighton Beach, Brighton, July 24

Free outdoor film spectacular

-Channel 4 Withnail And I night, July 31

Withnail And Us-a documentary about the making of the movie

Withnail On The Pier-classix scenes and vox pops from the sudience at Brighton Beach Withnail and I-main feature

GENERALLY ACKNOWLEDGED TO BE ONE of the funniest and most widely quoted movies of the last decade, Withnail And I follows two out-of-work actors, Withnail (Richard E. Grant) and Marwood (Paul McGann), as they escape the city to holiday in the cottage of Withnail’s oddball Uncle Monty. As their vacation collapses into a morass of drunkenness, dead fish and unwanted sexual advances from the old duffer himself, they realise that at least one of them must move on. It is, of course, a given that any true comedy fan should be able to recite the key scenes word-for-word. But if you’re a bit rusty, or simply not quite that sad, here’s a refresher course.

CLASSIC SCENES

“This is the morning . . .”

THE LOWDOWN: Withnail surveys their tip of a house.
THE BOOZE: Sixty hours’ worth of wine.
THE CHAT

Withnail: Right you fucker. I’m going to do the washing up.

Marwood: No, no you can’t. It’s impossible. I swear to you. I’ve looked into it. Listen to me, listen. There are things in there. . .There’s a teabag growing. You haven’t slept for 60 hours, you’re in no state to tackle it. Wait for the morning, we’ll go in together.

Withnail: This is the morning. Stand aside!

Marwood: You don’t understand. I think there may be something living in there.

Withnail: What do you mean? A rat?

Marwood: Possibly. It’s possible.

Withnail: Then the fucker will rue the day! (Seeing the kitchen devastation) Oh Christ Almighty. Keep back. . .keep back! The entire sink’s gone rotten.

TRIVIA: Daniel Day-Lewis was originally asked to play Withnail but turned the role down.

“You should never mix your drinks . . .”

THE LOWDOWN: Suffering from intense cold, Withnail imbibes lighter fluid.
THE BOOZE: Wine and lighter fluid combo plus “paint stripper”.
THE CHAT

Withnail: I must have some booze, I demand to have some booze! (He eyes a can of lighter fuel)

Marwood: I wouldn’t drink that if i was you.

Withnail: Why not?

Marwood: Because I wouldn’t advise it. Even the wankers on the site wouldn’t drink that. That’s worse than meths.

Withnail: Nonsense! This is far superior drink than meths. The wankers don’t drink it because they can’t afford it. (He swigs and grins) Got any more?

Marwood: No.

Withanil: Liar! What’s in your toolbox?

Marwood: We don’t have anything. Sit down.

Withnail: Liar! You’ve got anti-freeze!

Marwood: You bloody fool. You should never mix your drinks.

TRIVIA: The lighter fluid was vinegar, the consumption of which made Grant barf for real over McGann’s shoes.

“Miss Blenehassitt . . .”

THE LOWDOWN: The drunken pair attempt to procure afternoon tea in a Penrith tearoom.
THE BOOZE: Tea-plus quadruple shorts and pints prior to their arrival.
THE CHAT

Marwood: Just bring out the cakes.

Withnail: Cakes and fine wines.

Proprietor: If you don’t leave, we’ll call the police.

Withnail: Balls! We want the finest wines available to humanity. We want them here and we want them now.

Proprietor: Miss Blenehassitt, telephone the police.

TRIVIA: Teetotaller Grant got into character by swigging a tumbler of vodka and a dash of Pepsi.

“Camberwell Carrot . . .”

THE LOWDOWN: The pair return home only to find drug dealer Danny skinning up in their living room.
THE BOOZE: Erm . . . “herbs”
THE CHAT

Withnail: What are you going to do with those?

Danny: The joint I am about to roll requires a craftsman. It ca utilise up to 12 skins. It is called a Camberwell Carrot.

Marwood: It’s impossible to use 12 pages on one joint.

Danny: It is impossible to make a camberwell Carrot with anything less.

Withnail: Who says it’s a Camberwell Carrot?

Danny: I do. I invented it in Camberwell and it looks like a carrot.

TRIVIA: Originally envisaged as a novel, the story ended with Withnail blowing his head off with a shotgun.

STELLA SCREEN

For more information on the Stella Screen Outdoor Tour and other Stella activity, check out the website at: www.stellascreen.co.uk

Stella Screen Outdoor Tour in association with The Guardian and supported by Channel 4.

The first “real” novel REG has written. It’s an hilariously biting look at Hollywood, REG style, through the eye’s of Vyvian, interior designer to the stars. By Design is screaming to be made into a movie, with REG in the leading role. He’s made for the part, and the insiders jibes at thinly veiled Hollywood stars we all know and recognise would make it a great Robert Altman style satire.

Published by Picador

Read a REG Temple reader review

Buy it here

Thanks to Duncan Driver for sending us his review:

I have just finished reading “By Design” and must say that I am surprised by how much I enjoyed it. I loved “With Nails”, but the woeful reviews and inclusion of “Design” on Who Weekly’s worst books of 1998 had led me to expect that REG’s literary prowess had faded. Not so. “Design” has its flaws, but is one of those rare books that can make you laugh out loud, not just from REG’s fantastic gift for exaggeration and sarcasm, but also from the behavioral tendencies of his well crafted characters, many of which are instantly recognisable.

Richard Eagles and his wife Kyla are a thinly disguised Bruce and Demi, while Georgia’s lack of inhibition and tact and very reminiscent of the Sandra Bernhard antics REG described in his first book “With Nails”.

It is difficult not to grimace at each and every aspect of the ill-fated “Zeitgeist” as it descends into chaos, from Java’s attempted seductions to the final low of Jj behind bars and Mort in the hospital. This section of the book is wisely written in diary form, and affords the reader the same blow by blow account of a big budget films’ production the REG gave us of Hudson Hawk, making it all the more familiar and believable.

It is fair to say that REG does aim some pretty harsh criticism at the Hollywood phenomenon and the people that live in it, but the criticism is valid, and some faith in the community is restored by Vyvian, the sane and (relatively) calm protagonist of the novel that is all to aware of the towns’ flaws but loves it in spite of, or perhaps because of them from his inside observer position.

“By Design” delivers the same “barbs and shrewd observations” as “With Nails”, but allows us a deeper and more significant insight into the Hollywood Psyche. The plot and characterisation have their good and bad points, but overall “By Design” is a very funny and insightful novel that both attacks and marvels at the Hollywood.

Reviewed by Sally Odgers
– author of "Candle Iron", "Shadowdancers" and "Translations in Celadon"

Having bought "With Nails" to while away a long wait at the airport, and laughed my way all the way to the motel, I was delighted to discover "By Design". So – what do the books have in common, apart from their author and a highly individual and jaundiced look at Hollywood? 

A narrator who has the reader on-side and cheering him on from the first page. Both REG (narrator/hero of "With Nails") and Vyvian Cork, (narrator/hero of "By Design") are African-born. Both are tall, thin and dark. Both have a cynical way of looking at life, and both have a kindly touch that keeps their revelations well this side of cruelty. Both have an expert touch in shaping plots and describing larger-than-life characters.

With all this in common, are REG and Vy clones? Not in the least! REG is an actor, Vy is a designer. Both are observers, but REG observes from within, while Vy observes from without. REG is less sure of himself, less of an egoist.

"By Design" is a clever, witty, sharply observed novel that pokes barbed fun at the Hollywood we all watch from a safe distance. The language makes it unsuited to the young or easily shocked, but for anyone else, it’s great fun.

http://sallyodgers.50megs.com

Why not send in your review?